The Chronicles of Vladimir Tod Book 1 by Heather Brewer
Eighth Grade Bites (Chronicles of Vladimir Tod, Book 1) by Heather Brewer
2007
182 Pages
4/5
While thirteen year old Vladimir Tod’s friends drink their fruit juice boxes at school, he has his own bag of red drink….blood. Vladimir is what he thinks is the last of the vampires, the spawn of a human woman and his father, a vampire. He’s the first vampire to ever be conceived this way. And he defies traditional views of vampires. He can go into the sun as long as he has his sunblock on. He doesn’t drink blood from it’s source, but rather from his caregiver, Nelly. Well, not exactly FROM Nelly, but she brings him “blood bags” home from her work at the blood bank. He attends school with all of the other teens, though he’s less than popular and has to make sure to hide his fangs when he becomes angry.
His best friend is Henry, the only person in the world aside from Nelly to know that he is a vampire after he bit him during play when he was 8 years old. Vlad’s mother and father were killed mysteriously when he was younger and since then, Vlad has felt like an outsider. As much as Nelly and Henry try to make him feel normal and treat him as a human, he knows he is something else, a vampire. Things suddenly take a turn for the bizarre though when his english teacher goes missing and is later pronounced dead. Vlad starts to think that he may not be alone. Replacing his lost teacher is a bizarre man named Otis Otis.
Mr. Otis is a fun teacher that everyone seems to like except for Vlad. Otis teaches the class of various mythological and folklore creatures. Witches, zombies, ghosts, werewolves…and vampires. And he always seems to have his eye on Vlad. When he tries to enter into Vlad’s life more than a teacher is welcomed, Vlad grows worried. And he soon notices a mark on his teachers arm that is similar to the one that his father once wore, the same mark that is on a book of vampire secrets that his father left him. Combined with the discovery of his father’s journals, he soon begins to think that he may not be as alone as he once thought he was.
This first book in the Chronicles of Vladimir Tod was SO MUCH FUN! I really loved it. It’s not great literary writing by any means, but it’s a truly fun, fast paced, and relevant story. Brewer makes a lot of fun puns throughout the novel. Of course there is Vlad’s name…there’s also a kid named Edgar Poe who goes by Eddie. There’s a town nearby called Stokerton. A villian named D’ablo. You get the picture. But the novel isn’t all fun and games. Sure there are the moments that make you snicker, but the majority of the story is a well thought out tale of a kid trying to find himself while in a very strange world. Think of it as a YA coming of age novel with a twist thrown in.
Brewer “gets” teens and I think this bodes well for her books. This is a book that I would feel comfortable giving any kid that said “I hate reading.” (such horrible words). Want to know what I did as soon as I finished Eighth Grade Bites? Ordered Ninth Grade Slays
Can’t wait to continue with this series! And the third book comes out this month! And one more thing…these books have the best covers! I want Vlad’s hoodie!
Starfinder: Book One of the Skylords by John Marco
That Neil Gaiman fellow has a new book out that’s illustrated by that Dave McKean fellow. It’s called Crazy Hair. And it’s crazy good! Like The Day I Swapped My Dad for a Goldfish and Wolves in the Walls, Crazy Hair is a picture book collaboration between these two brilliant men. The story spins a hairy tale of a man with “crazy hair”….hair that is filled with lions and tigers and bears along with carousels and other wonderful and mysterious things. He hasn’t cut his hair since he was a small boy, and a universe of it’s own has tangled itself in it. It’s a fun little story of imagination, curiosity, and mysteriousness that I enjoyed quite a bit! And the illustrations by Dave McKean are just to die for as is nearly everything he does. I love his use of color in this book. It’s just fantastic! Highly recommend this one to add to your Neil Gaiman collection! If you have small children, they’ll love it, if you don’t, you’ll love it.
Voodoo Season by Jewell Parker Rhodes
About the Book:
The Forest of Hands and Teeth by Carrie Ryan
Glass Houses (Morganville Vampires, Book 1) by Rachel Caine
The Screwed Up Life of Charlie The Second by Drew Ferguson
The Eternal Smile: Three Stories by Gene Luen Yang and Derek Kirk Kim
in a fantasy world where he must bring back the head of a frog in order to avenge a princess’ father’s death and earn her hand in marriage. But there is something that distracts him along the way which eventually leads him to discover the true meaning of his quest. This is perhaps my favorite type of story…a tale that tackles the subject of emotional trauma through the escape of fairy tales. As Yang did with American Born Chinese, he surprised me with the ending. He does that with the next story as well.
Second story is entitled Gran’pa Greenbax and The Eternal Smile. This story centers around a frog that has a hunger for money. A hunger that is insatiable. When he gets all of the money in the world, he still isn’t satisfied…he just wants more. And it doesn’t matter to him what he does to get it or how it affects those around him. He’s run out of ways to make money until his assistant finds something beautiful, an eternal smile. It’s a smile that sits in the sky in the desert. The frog finds a way to make money off of this wonder by opening “the church of the eternal smile” and soliciting donations through his evangelical ways. But he is soon to learn that all of the money can’t make him a happy person. Another fantastic story.
Request. In this story, a young girl is unhappy at her job. She dedicates all of her time to her job but when she asks her boss for a raise and promotion, she is denied it and dismissed. She goes back to her desk and gets one of those spam emails from a “prince in Nigeria” who wants her to just send her banking information so that he can transfer $350,000,000 into her account. And she may be the only person in the world who falls for it. But in doing so, she makes friends with the sender of the emails and gets lost in a dream world that offers her every wish. This was a sad little story, but I rather liked it.








